


My Own

by hazelNuts



Category: All For the Game - Nora Sakavic
Genre: Alternate Universe, M/M, POV Andrew, Self-Mutilation, Soulmate-Identifying Marks, it's not graphic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-15
Updated: 2016-10-15
Packaged: 2018-08-22 15:13:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8290516
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hazelNuts/pseuds/hazelNuts
Summary: Andrew doesn't believe in soulmates, so what's the point of having a soulmate mark?





	

**Author's Note:**

> If you think I forgot any tags, please let me know in the comments.

Andrew doesn’t believe in soulmates. He doesn’t believe in the fairy tale ending that supposedly happens when you find that person whose mark matches yours, the person you belong to. He wanted to believe when he was younger,  _ fuck _ , he wanted to believe so badly. But when you’re moved to a new home every eleven months, and you have first-hand experience with what lurks in the darkest corners of people’s minds, you stop believing in fairy tales very young.

He doesn’t even check what his mark looks like when he turns seventeen and notices the black lines that have appeared just above his hip. He just goes to the kitchen to grab a knife and cut it out off him. When he’s done, he presses a towel to his side and waits for the ambulance to arrive, listening to the grinding of the garbage disposal as it annihilates his mark with a smile on his face.

Andrew Minyard doesn’t belong to anyone.

Nicky and Aaron come running when the ambulance stops in front of their door. Aaron looks confused, Nicky sad. Andrew only shakes his head when Nicky softly asked him  _ why _ . Just because Nicky got his fairy tale with Erik, that doesn’t mean Andrew will—and considering his past, the odds aren’t exactly in his favour.

Nurses  _ tsk _ and doctors shake their head as they patch him up. He doesn’t care. When he gets home, Aaron and Nicky don’t comment on what he did, just ask what he needs to heal properly.

When he goes to juvie, nobody cares about what he did to himself. He isn’t the only one with a damaged or removed mark. He can fight and play Exy, and that’s all that matters.

Abby inspects him for needle marks and doesn’t comment on the stretched out, misshapen form of what used to be his mark. Soulmate marks can’t ever be entirely removed. You can burn it or try to cut it out, but there will always be a trace left, a mockery of what your mark used to look like in lines that are several shades lighter than the rest of your skin.

Neil is an anomaly. He gets under Andrew’s skin, no matter how hard Andrew tries to stop him. The worst part is that he isn’t even trying, seems almost just as upset by the development as Andrew. And Andrew hates him for it. He hates how much he cares. He’s furious at Neil for saying what Andrew needs to hear when he needs to hear it, for staying silent whenever Andrew finds the company of other people too much to bear.

The day Neil pulls off his shirt and shows Andrew his scars, isn’t the first day Andrew considers throwing Neil out the window and just be done with it. He lets his eyes roam over Neil’s skin. There are so many scars. He wants to ask how Neil got each and every one of them, wants to brush his fingers over the bumps and ridges, and take away all the bad memories attached to them. His eye catches on the scar on Neil’s side, so similar to his own.

‘You cut out your mark,’ he states.

Neil shakes his head. ‘My mom did.’

‘Why?’

‘Soulmates are dangerous. They make you feel safe, make you forget they’re just people. People are dangerous.’ Neil says it like a school lesson, without feeling or conviction.

‘You don’t believe that,’ Andrew states. He tears his eyes off the scar and looks Neil in the eye. He’s careful to keep his face blank.

‘I like the idea of soulmates,’ Neil admits with a shrug. ‘I know they don’t guarantee a happy ending, but it felt like I had somewhere I belonged, a destination. Even if I never intended to go there.’

Andrew blinks. He’d never considered that, that having a soulmate was a little like having a home. That it can be someone you belong  _ with _ , and not  _ to. _ Suddenly, he wants that for Neil more than anything else.

‘You could have it replaced,’ he suggests.

‘I don’t have any pictures,’ Neil says, shaking his head.

No artist will tattoo a soulmate mark back onto your body without photographic evidence.

‘Besides,’ Neil continues. He places one of his hands next to Andrew’s, thumb pressing against the outside of Andrew’s hand. ‘I don’t need it.’

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://fandom-madnessess.tumblr.com/).


End file.
